I've Been Feeling Weepy

I'm sitting here wanting to write, and all that seem to come out of me are tears. I'm finding myself so weepy these past few days, and in turn feeling guilty for feeling this way. Why should I have the right to cry? After going through what John and I felt was such a close call for him, yet again, and then learning that John's cancer probably isn't back, I feel I should be jumping for joy, and don't have the right to have any other reaction. But it's hard for me to have my emotions so quickly yanked around -- yes, even if I'm feeling scared one day, and happy the next, due to good news. That probably doesn't make much sense to anyone, and I really am grateful that John is doing well, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Yet somehow I'm having trouble switching tracks and going back to being happy again. I imagine it's because I really don't know what to believe anymore, and I don't know what's going to happen next anymore, and I can't plan for anything. I'm so hyper vigilant -- almost waiting for the next shoe to fall.

Now I'm seeing it. I just need to relax, and take each day as it comes, making the most of that day. Then I'll never be disappointed... Because each day IS a good day...

For John -- I'll Stand By You

This song is dedicated to my husband, John Knox, a two time cancer survivor. It's I'll Stand By You by Carrie Underwood. A few weeks ago, John had another cancer scare. We were sure this time his cancer was back. The numbers and symptoms indicated it. I'll tell you more about it later, but I just wanted you to know that as of now, it appears he's still cancer-free. We were stunned when we heard the cancer was most likely back, and just as stunned to learn a few weeks later that it wasn't. But let me digress for a moment. During the weeks when we weren't sure if the cancer was back, or rather, were almost positive it was back, I would sing this song, I'll Stand By You, to John. Now it's "our song." Listen to the words, it's beautiful...

Monday Morning Question -- What is your Star Wars name?

Monday Morning Question -- What is your Star Wars name?

For those of you too young to remember, Star Wars came out in 1977. My husband John tells me he watched it 13 times the first year it played. But then he was 15 at the time. Over his lifetime he's probably seen Star Wars 30 times! Despite this, he says he's "primarily a Star Trek fan."

Now for the Monday Morning Question:
What is your Star Wars name?
Take the first three letters of your last name. Then add the first three letters of your first name. Finally, on the end of that add the last medicine you took.

My answer: My Star Wars name is KnoKriLantus

Now tell us --

What is your Star Wars name?

Do this one! It may be silly but it's lots of fun anyway! Krissy :)