Saturday, May 20, 2006

Way too stoic

Okay, I just read that last entry.  I sounded way too stoic.  Like I didn't need you all almost.  I just wanted to say that wasn't true.  I need you terribly.  It is very rough right now.  I was just trying to convey to you all that I wasn't devestated, that I will go on somehow, if it turns out to be true that John needs another transplant.  Because I MUST for him.  But yeah, I got a lot of needs too.  And a lot of hurts.  I cry at night.  That's about it.  Krissy   

27 comments:

  1. jlocorriere055/20/2006 3:13 AM

    We're all behind you Krissy, you've been so strong for John. It's only natural that you have to breakdown sometimes. Keeping you in my prayers. Jeannette xx

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  2. I'm glad you read your entry.  I didn't know what to say, Krissy.   We love ya, kid. We're here for ya.  To me, you sound tired and sad.  I'm so sorry. Take care, hon.  Hugs (((((John & Krissy)))))), Barb

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  3. randlprysock5/20/2006 5:05 AM

    Dear Krissy,
    Hang in there... we're all praying for you both.  I seem to be at a loss for words but I know God is looking down and caring for you both through this.  Big Hugs,
    Lisa

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  4. {{{{{{{{{{{Krissy}}}}}}}}}}}}}                                     {{{{{{{{{{{John}}}}}}}}}}}}}}


    Deb

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  5. Even on a blog one can read between the lines. It's tough, Krissy. Keep it up.

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  6. mastersblynn5/20/2006 7:23 AM

    All I can say to you Krissy is this....I love you! Barbara

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  7. My prayers are with you and John.
    Jackie

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  8. nightmaremom5/20/2006 8:43 AM

    Hugs and good wishes going your way.  I am keeping the both of you in my prayers.
    d
    http://journals.aol.com/nightmaremom/Thisandthatandhockey/

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  9. as a total unreligious person all i can say is my thoughts go out to you and John with deep empathy. Life always seems to attack the good peeps of this world.
    Both your strengths show as you're allowing others to comment... i don't think i could be as tough..... i really, truely hope everything turns out OK, but help and support is available from unknown community here (people like me).

    Best Wishes Darren (aka: c ya dafta 69 & greenleaf).

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  10. Thanks for the clarification....you couldn't get rid of us if you tried.

    Nancy

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  11. i really dont know what to say.. i wish i could say a magic word and make it all go away and john will magically be better..  i dont know how you do it, you are so strong. i am not sure i would be able to do what you do everyday.  if you need to cry then just cry, dont hold it in. you are allowed to be scared and upset, and you should not have to hide your feelings.

    my thoughts and prayers are with you and john.  i do hope he gets better really soon.

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  12. Hello.  Thanks for stopping by my journal.  I know your sis!  She reads my journal and I read of hers.  Have a great weekend.
    Missie

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  13. Krisssy....you are in my heart and prayers!
    Becky

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  14. It's okay to need your friends...I for one, worry about whether you are taking as good of yourself as you do John.  You deserve it, too.  I know you will be all right, no matter what, but somethines it is a lot of work to be "all right"...Jae

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  15. newsworthy8225/20/2006 11:57 AM

    i can't imagine what you must be going through. i know your faith will carry you through.
    the lord's blessing's to you:
    Melissa

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  16. I'm here always and will be on the phone later for a natter. Don't worry I've got hold of the number. Lots of love.
    Sylvia xxx

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  17. No explainations needed Krissy, take care my dear.

    Sandra xxxxx

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  18. kaydeejay54495/20/2006 1:52 PM

    Sending LOTS and LOTS of hugs and prayers for both of you.

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  19. I wouldn't leave you even if you kicked me to the curb or showed me to the door!
    Hell no ... I will not go!  Hell no ... I will not go!  (Chant with me, won't you?)  Hell no ... I will not go!  (I can't hear you!)  Hell no ... I will not go!
    Judith

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  20. Hello Krissy, John, my name is Peg, I live in Northern Ireland. I thought i would write to you and give your brain five minutes off from what is probably the most challenging time for you both. Who am I? Well, a 49 year old lady, who spent most of her adult life in England and came back to N.I. six years ago to care for Mum who had heart failure and lung complications. She is fine now, put it this way, she is healthier than me!  She has just got herself a new to her car, a little speedy Ford with a wing on the back and majorly wide tyres. The G-Force is erm...well...scary! So at 77 years old, this groovy granny is getting it on!  I work for the National Health Service here, supporting adult users of our services in the community, rather than in the acute (hospital) setting. There are only 2 million people in Northern Ireland. Our Trust looks after 210,000 of them. Some of the largest poor areas are in our Trust area, with the highest proportion of elderly. You may know Northern Ireland has had its troubles for the past 30 years. Mental health issues in the younger generations now feature large in health care. Thankfully The Troubles have diminished to those confined in ghetto areas. One day, it may all subside. But you know, the irish love their hero's, nothing like a martyr here! Hey ho. You may guess I am not from an irish family but i was born and went to high school here, and remain patriotic for what is a little country, yet full of life, and laughter, and getting on with it, against all the odds.
    The whole of Ireland encompasses both Northern and Southern Ireland, the latter being a republic, and as with UK, a member of the European Union. The isle is known for its beautiful countryside and often called the Emerald Isle due to the marvellous green of the grass, due to much rain - if the Atlantic is not sending it, you can be sure Scotland and beyond is lol.
    I will write to you again if you like, until then, may your God go with you.

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  21. you and John have my prayers and hugs. This must be so hard on both of you, I'm so sorry.  

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  22. princesssaurora5/21/2006 12:42 AM

    Oh Krissy... prayers coming for you both.  You didn't sound like you didn't need us, you sounded like a wife being positive and a trooper... the things you need to be... a lot.  

    Hang in there sweetie... I pray that good news will come for you both soon, you need it.

    be well,
    Dawn

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  23. How are you on this, the Lord's Day, my sweetest sister?  I was just reading Peg from N.I's comment.  Is she cool or what?!  Is there anything I can do for you?  So, if you are coming home anytime in the next week can you let me know so I can clean your apartment some... do your dishes and maybe vacuum?  We are going to go so Mr. Michael today.  It always brightens our spirits and excites us when we get to visit him =D!  So, Baby has this rubber fish that he makes me play fetch with him for four hours a day while I am on the computer.  Argh... then the rest of the day I have to toss this stupid little rubber fish.  He is driving me nuts with this thing.  I thought of hiding it, but he loves it so! LOL  He is whimpering at my feet right now to toss this gross little rubber thing.  LOL  Well, if you need anything call me... I thought I would let you know what was going on here =)!  Love you with allllllllllllllllllllll my heart!!  Love, your sissy xoxox P.S.  Do you have a good MMQ perhaps for tomorrow since I may have new readers?  If not, do not sweat it!
    http://journals.aol.com/valphish/ThereisaSeason

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  24. quartrlyfecrysis5/21/2006 11:19 AM

    No need to explain.  I, as well as others, know but don't quite understand how hard this is for you to go through every day.  You take care of yourself doll, and that wonderful husband of yours.  No false hopes, no pretending I know how you feel, only genuine hope for the best for you and John.   You're both in my thoughts and prayers.
    <<<<<HUGS>>>>>> ...with bony elbows and all ;)

    ~Bernadette

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  25. I don't think it is stoic to show inner strength.    You are being as positive as you can be which is the best you can do.     Keep finding that strength to get through another day.     I think the medical treatment is the best it could be and the outcome will be the best also.     I will be thinking about you and John and waiting to find out what will come next.      Hugs,     mark

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  26. Krissy,
    I realize that you don't really know me, but I am the guest editor for J-Land Journals this week and I wanted to compliment your sister's lovely writing and I wanted to tell you that you must be one STRONG woman.  You've been through a lot.  John is fortunate to have such a strong wife.

    I will use some of the positive thoughts we have floating around here at Positive Pals . . .  and also some prayers for John.  Sending our best to you!

    Blessings,
           Cyn

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  27. Krissy,  this is Jan.  This is my first visit to your journal and I am so sorry you are going through all these hard times with your husband, John.  I am have a journal too, living with pulmonary fibrosis, and the only thing that can "cure" my disease is a transplant, however, I don't qualify for one so I know my disease will run its' own course.  I only tell you that to let you know, I can feel a little of what you are going through while I watch my dear, sweet husband, who is also named John, care for me when he needs to and see his sadness when he thinks I am not watching....  We will add you both to our prayer list and keep up with you two on your journal.  Spirit and attitude can keep pushing us along when treatments cease to help :)

    Jan

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