Monday, July 28, 2008

Monday Morning Question


What do you have a tendency to put off?

My answer:  going to the dentist

Now your turn.  Answer the question in my comment section below or answer it in your journal/blog and leave a link in my comment section so we can come check out your answer. 

Sunday, July 27, 2008

John and I are going to Hershey to see how he is doing

Ugh, I just wrote an entry and it got eaten or something.  Uggggghhhhhh.  The whole entry.  I hate that. 

I just wanted to tell  you all that John and I are going to Hershey Medical Center, the hospital where John had his bone marrow transplant.  He will get a few things checked out.  He may get a test making sure he is still in remission.  He will also get a test regarding his kidneys.  We will let you know more when we know the results.

Please pray!

Okay, I am off, wish us a safe trip.  I will try to post again soon, hopefully nobody will be on the computer tomorrow at Hope Lodge and there will be a Monday Morning Question and a photo shoot tomorrow. 

We will see.  Sometimes the other residents don't get off the community computer there, when I tell them it is "my" computer, LOL!

Love you all, and hope to write soon, Krissy :)

But I don't want to go in the MRI machine...

A lot has happened since I wrote last.  Gee, that was this past Monday.  I haven't made an entry because my computer really has been shutting on and off.  It's the hard drive.  It's just too old.  I'm definitely going to have to get a new computer.
I've also been really busy.  Lots of doctor's appointments.  The surgeon I was sent to for my shoulder and arm wants me to have an MRI on Thursday, and is deciding if I should have one or two surgeries, from the result of the MRI.  He definitely wants me to have laproscopic surgery, and then perhaps another surgery.  I'll explain when I have more time, why I might have to have two surgeries instead of one.  But right now I have to get some things done.
I just wanted to say one thing about the MRI though, before I get back to work.  I don't want to do it.  I am sceeeeeered, LOL.  The MRI is on Thursday.  It will be a closed MRI with contrast.  I don't mind the dye.  I mind being in the tube.  I panicked so badly in it last time.  Call it an anxiety attack, a panic attack, I don't know what it was, but I wanted to get out the whole time I was in there.
I asked them for music, before I went in, which they obliged me with.  That was great, because it made the time go by so much faster.  But I still panicked somewhat.  Anything they did to make me comfortable didn't work.  
I have this irrational fear that they are going to leave me in there!  And go home or something.  My sister Therese asked me something last night that helped me.  She asked, "How can they leave you in there, when other patients are scheduled to have MRIs right after you?  They HAVE to take you out!"
Okay, so that makes sense.  The she said, "Don't worry, even if there is a fire, and the electricity stops working, it only takes them six to eight minutes to get you out."  "Shut up, Therese!," I said.  I hadn't even thought of the little scenario where the electricity stops working.  I asked her what made her think anybody would wait around for eight seconds to manually pull me out of a vault if the place was burning up?  Ugh...
After telling me this, she did redeem herself again, LOL.  She told me what I should do.  "Tell them you are scared.  Tell them to talk to you periodically and ask you if you are okay.  If you know that they are watching out for you, you won't be as nervous.  Have them remind you you can press the bottom at any time if you need help.  They can talk you through it."
Now THAT made sense.  And if all else fails, I could take two Ativan, LOL.  The surgeon promised.  
Love you all,
Krissy :) 

Monday, July 21, 2008

my computer is fixed

Good morning!  Just a quick entry to let you all know my computer is fixed.  As fixed as it is going to get, anyway.  It is almost five years old.
Last night I fixed the computer.  It had completely ceased to work (as far as connectivity and other things) at about, maybe 4 pm, and I was somewhat scared, as I didn't know if it was going to totally crash soon, and I wanted to copy my pics to disk. 
Talk about being a last minute person - I am such a procrastinator - I should have copied my pics to disk ages ago.  My wedding photos are on there, as well as John's bone marrow transplant photos and his hospitalizations, for the past two and a half years. 
Fortunately, the computer hadn't crashed, and I was still able to access the documents and pics, thank the Lord.  So I copied them to disk.
After that, I tried a few things, and now the computer is working better than ever!  Go figure.  So I am going to use it until it dies, I guess, and then I will get a new one.  It will be five soon, so I don't know how long it will be before it does die, but I guess it is this one for now.  You know something though - this one is not so slow now, LOL...   
Okay, I've got to run.  I have a lot of things to do today.  After I finish up some things in my graphics group I am going to go shopping for the Hershey trip this weekend. 
Maybe get a new haircut.  A new haircut should be fun!  Something short and sassy, LOL.  Not really sassy, just fun.  That used to not be me, my hair was super long most of my life.  But I can't wear it that way any more because it is too thin.  When it is shorter it is fuller.  Okay, I guess I should leave this topic for a "girl talk" blog or something, LOL.     
Love you all,  Krissy :)

Sunday, July 20, 2008

how John is doing

It's been days since I've done an entry.  That's because I have been working on my computer, which continues to go on and off at will.  I am going to finally store my pics and documents to disc today, if this old thing will allow me, and then try one more fix.  I hope it works!
It's not been easy these past couple of weeks.  So what's new with that?  I've kept myself busy though, as I have lots of things to do...  I wanted to get on here and tell you all some things though.  I debated about whether or not to tell you all this, but since my husband mentioned it in his blog, I am going to go ahead and mention it.       
Okay, I'll cut to the chase.  Don't panic (ya, right), but John is having some health problems right now.  You all know that he had two cancers (Non Hodgkin's Lymphoma and bone marrow cancer), both which are being held in remission by his bone marrow transplant.  Well, for a couple of weeks John had no immunities.  His regular oncologist, Dr. Claxton, was on vacation, and the oncologist subbing is concerned John's cancer is back (indicated by the fact that John keeps having no immune system this late after his bone marrow transplant).  Dr. Claxton's nurse, Mitzi, has also been on vacation.  When she got back, she told John she didn't think his cancer was back, and that Dr. Claxton hadn't mentioned it to her.
So now we wait and see.  Mitzi says it is highly unlikely, though.  I am sure she or Dr. Claxton don't want to commit 100% until after he examines John.  John has an appointment on July 28.  That is Monday after tomorrow.  We leave on this Sunday coming up (July 27).  
Anyway, it's been a little rough because answers were changing daily, different doctors saying different things, and one night a few nights ago John got a significant fever.  The sub doctor told usto get him to Hershey Medical Center (the facility where John got his bone marrow transplant) immediately, and have him admitted.
He told us what sounded to us like horror stories (like he thought John's cancer was back, that he had a bad infection that could kill him, etc), but then Mitzi corrected what he said the next day, or what she thinks is true about John anyway, and his situation. 
Anyway, fortunately, John's temperature dropped to normal.  Because there were no beds available, and John would have waited in two ERs (local and Hershey), for up to 24 hours, before he was up in a hospital bed at Hershey.
John did end up getting a Neulasta shot a few days later, to raise his immunities, so he wouldn't get any infections that could kill him.  So now he has a high immune system.  But while they did that, they found kind of bad kidney damage.  He only had 25 to 30% to start with, and now it is worse.  Now Dr. Claxton needs to explore what is causing that.
Hopefully the kidney's lack of partial functioning won't cause dialysis soon.
It is strange to see.  A man walking around normally, doing every day things, not far from dialysis, perhaps?  Could that even be possible?  We just got some info. back in the mail we needed to join the YMCA.  He was going to do regular exercise.  He doesn't appear that weak.
Well, anyway, we will find out more about it when he goes to the oncologist on July 28.  John's oncologist, Dr. Claxton, will be checking out his kidneys, as opposed to the nephrologist (kidney doctor) on that date, as it was John's bone marrow transplant that hurt his kidneys in the first place.  Actually it wasn't the actual transplant that hurt his kidneys.  John's kidney problems were caused by a medicine he was taking after the transplant to make sure the bone marrow transplant worked, or the kidney problems may have been caused by some mismatched blood blood that was given to him after the bone marrow transplant. 
So I am not panicking or anything, just telling you all what is going on, in case my computer shuts down soon, and it takes me a short while to get another one.  I just wanted you to know.  I am kind of taking this all in stride, as we don't have any definite information yet, and why be upset if we don't know for sure?
If I were to get freaked out every time they said John might be having a relapse I would constantly be freaked out.  I just can't do it.  I need to remain stable.  It would drive me nuts.  
The kidney part is harder to deal with.  I don't want to see him on dialysis.  I won't tell you why.  Because he may not have to go on it.  We'll save that for if he really has to go on it.  For now let's remain positive! 
Time to go get back to work!  
Love you all, and I hope you are having a good weekend,
Krissy :) 

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

what's been going on lately

So much has happened lately, and because the computer has been switching on and off, and because I just haven't had time, I haven't written about what has been going on in the past week or so. 
It's been rough lately.  I woke up early this morning because my back was spasming.  We are talking waves and waves of spasms.  I had to get up about 4 am, because laying there made the spasming worse.  This has been going on for several weeks.  I am on muscle relaxant number four, in the past couple of weeks, because none of them would work.  I switched again hoping this last muscle relaxant would take care of the spasms, or at least lessen the pain.  I wish I hadn't asked my physician to switch me again.  This one works the least best.
To walk around in such pain makes me feel so edgey.  Sometimes I am snapping at John.  That is so unlike me.  And sometimes I can't get any housework done.  Sometimes I just cry.  Nights are the very worst.  I lay there waiting for morning to come so I can get up.  I think nights are particularly bad because I tense up, bracing myself against the spasms.  This only makes them worse.  After awhile I give up and get up.  I am sure the sleep deprivation is not helping me any.
I'm also disappointed that the Sports Medicine Physician told me, a couple of days ago - that I needed to go see the Orthopedic Surgeon to possibly get the procedure I was hoping to avoid.  After my occupational therapy ended about a month ago, even though I have been doing my exercises at home, my left shoulder/arm has not been getting any better.  Well, my shoulder and arm appeared to be getting better for awhile, but the progress seems to have reversed itself.  Dr. Bosha (the Sports Medicine Physician)  told me that this sometimes happens.  That somebody can only progress so far with OT and exercises at home.  Some people never progress beyond a certain point and need surgery anyway, regardless of how many exercises they do.
Who would have thought?  Now he is sending me to the surgeon.  I asked him if there was the possibility if another tear could occur in my rotator cuff, like the injury I had before, if the surgery was performed.  Actually, it is not surgery, per se, Dr. Bosha explained.  While you are asleep, the surgeon takes your shoulder and moves it around, to break up all the scar tissue.  Dr. Bosha said no, I would not have another tear in my rotator cuff.  Not one that would have to be mended by surgery, anyway.  Just a bunch of little tears would occur.  *Sigh* 
After surgery I will have to go back to Occupational Therapy.  At the Physical Therapy Outpatient Facility.  And know what?  I don't have time.  John is having some problems.  I need to be here for him.  He could be called to go to Hershey Medical Center (his hospital, and bone marrow transplant center, a couple of hours a way) at any time.  He will definitely have to go on July 28, but maybe has to go sooner.  A lot is going on with him right now medically...  I need to tell you all about it, but this entry is getting too long, and I don't think you want three entries from me today, LOL.  So I will post about it tomorrow if my computer is still alive.  Suffice it to say that John needs me, if nothing else to keep him out of trouble and away from germs to keep his immune system up!
At the same time, yes, I need to look after myself.  Hmmmm, such a juggling act!  Yes, I will take care of myself also, both of us at the same time...
Thanks for sticking with me,  Krissy :)

on making my entries more personal

I was sitting on the couch earlier this morning thinking.  Thinking about how I had written a couple of weeks ago in this blog that I wanted my entries to be more personal, and show more of my feelings.  I wondered if I was accomplishing this.  I talked to somebody yesterday who told me she felt I didn't write about my feelings in my blog.  Ouch.  That hurt. 
I guess there's a reason.  It's because of certain people that read.  Okay, that's all I am going to say about that.  Except this.  I can't let myself worry about that.  I must be free to say exactly what I want.  I talked to John about it, and he said I should say exactly what I want to say in my blog.  And that I shouldn't feel intimidated about saying things in it, because people might judge me, or they might not understand me, or they might not like me, or whatever.  Who cares.  I can write whatever I want.  As long as I don't set out to hurt anybody intentionally.   
Having John's support in this matter feels really good.  I can't let my life be run by others who may judge what I write, and if I feel I should say something, from now on I am going to say it.  
So from now on I am going to try to make my entries more personal.  And I'll also try to share more of my feelings.  Thanks for staying with me all this time.  
And thanks to that person who showed me the way!  ;)
Love you all,   Krissy 

Sunday, July 13, 2008

JLand Photo Shoot #137 participants... July fun

                           JLand Photo Shoot #137:  July fun!

Sorry I have been so late in posting.  My computer continues to turn off and on at will.  I didn't even think I would be able to do this entry, but attempted it because I know how important it is to post when you all take the time to go out and take your photos.   
I was just in the middle of posting this entry several minutes ago and lost the whole thing!  Ugh.  After I finish this entry I don't know when I will be back online again.  We'll see.  But for now I wanted to post the participants so you can check out their photos.
Here they are:
    Dana of My Photo Lounge shows us fireworks she took
 Nutwood Junction  -  Beth shows us her family celebration of the 4th which included Snakes and Fountain type fireworks! 
This and that, and hockey!  -  Donna shows us her great-niece and -nephew having a blast in the pool.  
Koda's Corgi Tales  -  Betty showed us some shots of her local baseball team. 
FREEZE FRAME -  Connie took photos of her neighbor's fireworks.  Watch the slideshow.  It's worth viewing.
Footprints in the Sand -  Linda shows us the picnic she and her family went to on July 7 in Yosemite National Park and the waterfall they hiked to!
For those of you who played along, a big thank you!  This was a real fun topic!
I also participated, but because my computer is not working correctly, I can't upload my photos.  I took pictures of fireworks!  When I am able to show my photos I will post them.  Oh, did I mention that I have a new digital camera?  I don't remember.  It is red and sleek and cool!  And most importantly takes cool pics, LOL.  I can't wait to use it more, but right now I can't even hook it up to the computer.  Because I can't download the software onto this computer.  Oh well!  I will soon be able to use my camera more when I either get this computer fixed or get a new one...  
Okay, back to discussing the participants who played in the photo shoot this time.  I just wanted to say I am hoping that everybody will take a look at these precious entries if they haven't already done so. 
Gotta get off of here before I lose this entry again!
Love you all, Krissy :) 

Saturday, July 12, 2008

my computer going down

Hi.  It's Krissy. 
My computer works one minute and then stops working the next.  And then maybe 10 hours later it might work again.  I am getting frustrated.  So meanwhile what I am frantically doing is arranging my documents and my photos/graphics properly, then I am going to copy everything to disk.  I fear this computer is going to crash at anytime, and I hope to copy to disk everything before it does so.  So if you don't see more from me for a day or two, you will know what I am doing.  And if this computer won't work, I will be buying a new one, and that will take a little time to get set up.  But please do't forget about me, b/c I won't be away for too long, LOL.
Love you all, Krissy :)
PS  I just talked to my nephew on the phone, and when I explained everything to him, he said it sounded like what is going on is a hardware problem.  I think it would be cheaper to get a new computer than to fix one with a hardware problem.  We shall see. 

Monday, July 7, 2008

Monday Morning Question, what is up with Krissy...

Hi, this is
Valerie, Krissy's sister.  Krissy is having severe computer problems.  She thinks her computer will crash soon.  She wanted to update you on her holiday weekend and give you a Monday Morning Question this morning, but her computer won't allow her to sign on.

I am letting you all know this in case she won't be able to post for days or even a week.  I will keep you all updated.  Since she can not post herself, here is the Monday Morning Question:


If you were to grill out this weekend, name four foods and a drink you would bring along?

my (Val's) answer: London Broil Steak, baked potato with sour
                          cream,  Watermelon, brie cheese, and orange
                          juice with ice

Krissy's answer:  Delmonico Steak, macaroni salad, Caesar Salad,
                       fresh fruit salad, and unsweetened iced tea

Tell us your answer.  Please put your answer in the comment section below, or do this as an entry in your blog and leave a link with a complete URL so we can visit your answer.  Thanks!  Have a super day!  Val of
There is a Season

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