Wednesday, November 14, 2007

how do you feel about the title cancer survivor?

Here I am again, waiting about five days to write an entry.  I better hurry, I have someone coming over in fifteen minutes.

I hope my fonts aren't messed up again when I post.  That last entry was crazy.  The whole thing was supposed to be comic sans 14, LOL.  The whole thing messed up when I posted.  I am troubleshooting, and nothing is working.

At any rate, I have been so busy, I forgot to ask the Monday Morning Question this week.  I remember leaving it for this particular week as it was something real important that I wanted us all to consider.  Oh well.  I guess it couldn't have been too important though, because I can't remember what it was, LOL.  If I remember I'll ask it next week!

So, I have been extremely busy as always.  But the past two days I have taken out a little time for fun.  Last night I went to a writing workshop on freelance writing.  I found it more than fascinating.  There is a writer's group that meets in my town once a month to learn about writing and to network.  I think I will attend it.  There are even job leads.  I don't know if I want to do writing for a living in the future, but you never know. 

Another thing that I did that was a nice break was go to a Thanksgiving dinner.  Yes, our cancer association had ours early, LOL.  I am laughing because it is way too early but we did it anyway.  We had wonderful music.  We also honored Judy, the founder of the organization.  She passed away from cancer a few months ago.  It was hard but we got through it.

That reminds me of something.  The local cancer group leader was discussing with us the other day at our meeting that perhaps she didn't like the name of our group.  It has the words "cancer survivor" in it.  She said, some with cancer die, therefore they are NOT cancer survivors.  I was horrified.  How ludicrous.  That is not how I look at it at all.  Then I thought about it.  She is on the cancer board, and wants to help with cancer related issues, but she has a different outlook than most of the group members on LOTS of things from the rest of the  group.  This is because she has never had cancer, nor has she been a caregiver.  She doesn't know what it's like.

She was telling the board that we should really consider changing the name of our group (Cancer Survivors), as if those who have died are NOT cancer survivors.  That it is wrong to those with a terminal diagnosis, or those who are simply not sure if they will live, to call them survivors at any point in their illness.  To be hoenst, I was shocked, and kind of hurt.  First of all, who is to say who lives?  Secondly, who is to say what value that life has?  Thirdly, they are survivors in heaven.  That is what I believe.  They have always had that title, do NOT TAKE It away.

I asked John what he thought about the title Cancer Survivor.  By the way, John was told that there was NO WAY on earth that he could possibly survive when he was first diagnosed with cancer.  He was told this from his first cancer, when he had lymphoma, nine years ago.  He was told that the chemo would buy him five years, but that was it.  When he found out that he was a CANCER SURVIVOR, he said it brought him real hope!  He loved the title!  He was like, I won't die, here's pie in your eye!  Or at least I have a chance!  He said it gave him real hope!  And if he died, at least he had a title!  So there!

So I just wanted to know, you out there who are cancer survivors, and who are reading this, do you like the title?  How do you feel about it?       

And those of you who aren't cancer survivors, you can answer too.  Just curious.  What do you think of the title cancer survivor?  I'd like to know.  Maybe I'll pass the information on to her.  Without showing her the entry or names, of course.  Just a vote count.  Thanks.

Krissy 

11/14/07 12:25 pm  Edit:  OK, so somebody corrected me.  And was right.  You all aren't cancer survivors.  That's not the right term.  You're Survivors.  Sorry.

Krissy :)

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25 comments:

  1. No cancer here...but my brother died of AIDS 14 years ago.  Each day he was alive he was surviving....I like the name Cancer Surviver!
    Becky

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  2. deshelestraci11/14/2007 12:10 PM

    I think the title is fitting.  What would you be if not a survivor of cancer?  Dead, I'm afraid!
    Traci

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  3. First I'm glad you had a great early Thanksgiving with your cancer assoc.  I've always understood in logic what the term "cancer survivor" meant but can say honestly, I always saw the term as surviving the ORDEAL for many cancers which treatments bring one to the edge of death.  THAT'S what I call a survivor, no matter the prefix.  It matter not, I say, whether they know what they'll die of, since no one really does.  "Cancer Survivor" to me means you survived the worst of it, and intend to continue fighting till you can't anymore.  Kudos!  CATHY
    http://journals.aol.com/luddie343/DARETOTHINK/    

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  4. sugarsweet05611/14/2007 12:27 PM

    Cancer Survivor! I AM!!!! And intend to keep fighting & continue to be a cancer Survivor! I LOVE THE TITLE!
    Sugar

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  5. Cancer Survivor is an appropriate title, and one that you really should stick with. Because it does show that you can survive cancer, that you can kill cancer rather than the other way round. It shows a positive, combative attitude, one that you really need if you or someone near you suffer from cancer. I don't understand that lady's attitude at all. I think she just freaks at the mere mention of the C word.

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  6. I don't like that phrase, to be honest. There are many people who fight cancer for years. They survive the disease for so long and then die. That doesn't mean they didn't survive it. But, they just survived for only so long.
    I don't think a person should be defined by their disease. I never liked labels. But, if it gives people hope, than perhaps we should use it.
    Pam

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  7. I feeel the tiitle is very appropriate Krissi.Take Care God Bless Kath
    astoriasand http://journals.aol.co.uk/astoriasand/MYSIMPLERHYMES

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  8. I think that the word cancer, in the minds of some, brings thoughts of 'the old days' when cancer was a whispered word uttered only in private places.  

    Survivor makes one think of life or hope.

    So, I think I see both sides of the conversation here ....

    But, it is not for me to say if it's a good name or a bad name for your group.  Your GROUP should decide what is or is not the name or title or label you want to use.

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  9. Cancer Survivor works for me....those going through this give their all to continue to have a tomorrow and fortunately the treatments work for a lot. For those you don't make it, they were survivor and fighters and gave it their all.  If not Cancer Surviror, then I'd go with Cancer Fighter.   Arlene (AJ)

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  10. I am proud to be a cancer survivor. As long as I am living I will be a cancer survivor. Hopefully when I die from old age I will still be a cancer survivor! I don't see anything wrong with the title. I guess some people are so freaked out by having cancer that when they are done with treatment they don't want to be reminded of it by having themselves labeled, but it is a part of who I am now.
    Take care,
    Trish

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  11. hugsdoodlewacky11/14/2007 4:43 PM

    (((((((((((((((KRISSY)))))))))))))))))I aggree with the 2 comment.I would keep the name as it is,dont change it,why?Its always been than way,even I hear it all the time.I aggree with you.Have a nice evneing.

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  12. midwestvintage11/14/2007 5:13 PM

     I like Cancer survivors.  My MIL has cancer she is not treating and we know it will take her someday.  But she is surviving day to day with all it entails.  Surviving for another another day.  The fears and worries and the joys.  So yes, I like it.

                                 Julie

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  13. Hi Krissy,
    I love the term cancer survivor.  I am proud to be one.  We remember those who did not survive their battle with great sadness.  But it's not fair to take away the title from those of us who did SURVIVE.  It keeps us going and I think that is important.
    Jackie

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  14. firestormkids0411/14/2007 5:16 PM

    My Aunt Merrie is a cancer survivor.  When she was first diagnosed with breast cancer the doctor told her "if" she survived the surgery - double radical mastectomy - she would likely not survive for a year.  Auntie Merrie never swore - ever - but she said "Go to hell!" This was 33 years ago when cancer was not understood and research in it's infanthood.  Auntie Merrie survived 5 years and shortly thereafter had a recurrance of cancer - metastized throughout her body.  She went into the hospital where she brought joy to all she met.  She knew she would die, but gave hope to every cancer patient she met.  I believe that as she went Home to the Lord, she was still and now a CANCER SURVIVOR.  I would never take that away from her.  Many blessings and much love, Penny  http://journals.aol.com/firestormkids04/FromHeretoThere http://journals.aol.com/firestormkids04/TimeforaLittlePoetry

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  15. well I have to say that during my cancer I was too scared to join a group. I could barely look at the other peoples having chemo. I liked to speak to people that did survive but people having cancer may like myself not feel they have survived anything at all. I still have worries it will come back and I will die. It maybe very erational of me. I spoke to Krissy online and she gave me plenty of comfort, one of the few honestly. I am more of an independant personality type... anyway I am going on and on here but I have to say that I dont like the word at all... I feel like the people that deal with cancer are more like cancer wariors, I just say well I had cancer and its supposed to be cured... I dont think I even use the word survivor often for fear I will jinx myself. I kinda like the terms, dealing with cancer, or cancer in our lives... so many of us do have forms of it or know people that are close to us so many of us deal with it. I did ramble on I just wish in all honesty there was another word , but maybe I will never feel like totally comfy or out of the water until Im 85 and dying of old age lol... I do want to say that having cancer and making it through did give me a new outlook on life and was one of the best things that ever happened to me... so go figure!!!

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  16. i think cancer survivor is a very proud and hopefull name

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  17. Well Krissy, personally I do not like Cancer Survivors but that could just be me at the moment.  Having so recently gone through my treatment and not being able to know if it has all gone for another six months I do not even like thinking about it.  Maybe when and if I get the all clear I will feel differently.  Right now I feel like another of your commentors, that saying you are a survivor is tempting fate.  And if I do get the all clear and stay all clear then I want to put it behind me and not think of it again.  My emotions are still very raw. I think for a group who have been given the all clear a better name would be Conquerors.  Anyway, that is my opinion right now.  I would not want to be part of any group that had the the other C word in it as a constant reminder.  I still find it difficult to handle. xxxxxxx

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  18. I think hat cancer survivor's are STRONG, DETERMINED, and AWESOMELY BRAVE.  They give the rest of us hope for the little stuff we deal with.  They renew our faith in God and in mankind.  I like the term!!  Just as I like both of you!! xoxoxxoxo Merry

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  19. Hi Krissy- I have never had cancer, but know quite a few who have.  Most survived, but a few who haven't or won't.  However, I think the term cancer Survivor would give more hope to someone who has it- I mean, many people survive it now with so many treatments.  Those folks I know who have terminal cancer fight it anyway as if they will survive.  I don't think it's misleading at all, because not only itgives hope to try andbeat it no matter what doctors say, but also those who know they won't beat it still give it everything they can, and really  live before their cancer takes them.  Does that make sence?  My aunt has terminal cancer.  She's 91, beaten it a few times before- and to ask her how she is, even though she knows she's dying, she says, "I look great and I feel great!  Other than that, I'm fine!"  Maybe it's her age that gives her that outlook, but it's an attitude, I think that anyone of any age should take if they're fighting for and with their life.  God Bless you Krissy- and all who have fought, or are fighting this!  Love Carolyn

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  20. rdautumnsage11/15/2007 6:53 PM

    What I'm about to say doesn't relate to Cancer, but it's my take on the word Survivor. As everyone knows I've been an advocate against Domestic Violence. I remember someone once saying to me, I was a survivor after having come through yet another horrible beating. I looked at her and said "What exactly am I surviving if I'm still dealing with it? So in a way I understand the directors concerns over the name. You have people that are fighting Cancer their entire lives, or worrying about having a relapse. Would they look at it the same way I did, what are they surviving if they are still fighting......

    Something like "Tomorrow's Hope" or "Wish For The Cure" would make more sense to me. Then again like I said, I haven't had this battle. Mine was completely different. (Hugs) Indigo

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  21. alwaysireneann11/16/2007 1:30 AM

    Krissy - To be completely honest...I am one of those people who doesn't like labels at all.  HOWEVER, if we're going to be literal CANCER SURVIVOR whether the diagnosis is terminal or the person is in remission...is absolutely what people (me included) with cancer should be called.  We are each survivors no matter what stage our cancer is in.  I refer to myself as "living with cancer and a cancer survivor".  I am proud to say it and completely optimistic too.  There isn't one person surviving this battle who doesn't know what their "outcome" could possibly be...until then we are all CANCER SURVIVORS.
    Hugs and an abundance of prayers and blessings to you ~  Irene
    http://journals.aol.com/alwaysireneann/meet-me-at-the-breakfast-table

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  22. irisheyes192911/16/2007 10:31 AM

    When my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, and she got through her first year, we were calling her a one year survivor, even though she was still going through all kinds of treatments.  Now that it's all been over for awhile, she is a six year survivor as of last July 5.  

    I suppose it all depends on what the patient wants...obviously my mom was hell bent on sticking around, so each year is a new celebration.  Glory be to God she is well!!

    -Kellen

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  23. Krissy, so sorry it is taking me so long to answer this, but I can NOT think of ANY OTHER name but cancer survivor, what cancer patient, victim??  NO!!  Survivors do go to heaven, so it is a GOOD, honest, appropriate name!  Judy IS a cancer survior!!  Love, Val xox
    http://journals.aol.com/valphish/ThereisaSeason

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  24. Hi Krissy,  I do NOT like the term "Cancer Survivor."  My slogan on my personal business card is: "I Survived....Now I Thrive!"  I do NOT mention the word cancer, because I've survived much more than that.  I personally think the use of the term varies from person to person.  I choose not to put a label on myself; I also do NOT like titles, never have.  I do not like letting people know that I've battled cancer because they start to treat me differently...they become "standoffish."

    My chances for living were slim to none as well, however, I would not let the doctors tell me how long they felt I had to live when they first diagnosed me because I knew that it wasn't up to them.  I didn't go through chemo as if I wasn't going to make it...don't get me wrong, I had those doubtful days, but I also had that mustard seed of faith!

    Krissy, I've enjoyed reading your blog. Take care and keep the faith!  God Bless!

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  25. Hey, Sis!

    I think I have a different outlook than the majority of folks.  Firstly, I just don't live my life ... or survive it ... I THRIVE ... so there's that.  :)  Secondly, I had cancer; now I don't.  It's that simple for me.  So I BEAT it, and now it's not a part of my life anymore.  I'm not in remission, and God willing, it will NEVER be a part of my life again.  I don't know if that makes sense to anyone, anywhere, at all.  But to me, I'm someone who is blessed to enjoy a CANCER FREE life, fully thriving -- one day at a time.  Love you!  Shawnee :)

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